Showing posts with label Andy Borowitz. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Andy Borowitz. Show all posts

Thursday, April 11, 2013

Republicans Call for Tougher Sanctions on Beyoncé

Arguing that their recent trip to Cuba had made them “America’s No. 1 national-security threat,” a group of Republican lawmakers today called for tougher sanctions on the entertainers Beyoncé and Jay-Z. “We must send a strong message to Beyoncé and Jay-Z that the United States of America will not tolerate this kind of provocation,” said Rep. Mario Diaz-Balart (R-Florida), who blamed President Obama for “permitting the crisis to escalate dangerously.” “While the President has allowed himself to be distracted by North Korea, Beyoncé and Jay-Z were engaged in threatening activities right in our own hemisphere,” he said, charging the President with being “soft on Beyoncé.” Echoing his sentiments, Rep. Ileana Ros-Lehtinen called for the “toughest economic sanctions possible to isolate the growing threat posed by Beyoncé and Jay-Z.”
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White House spokesman Jay Carney cautioned that they would probably have little to no effect: “Right now, Jay-Z and Beyoncé have more money than the U.S. government does.”